Summer is flying by and so many people are posting on social media. I am included in this group. Social media has become our norm, how we, so called, stay in touch. Many of whom we follow on social media we haven't talked to or even seen in years. Yet here we are thinking we are "friends" and that we know what is going on in each other's lives.
I have heard so many times in the last 6 months "Oh you look so happy"! …..hmmm...well first off I posted a picture of a chicken and a horse. This just shows how we make assumptions! Just because I post a picture of a chicken doesn't mean my life is one way or another. But this is what social media does, leads us to believe what we see and compare ourselves to others based on social media.
Well let me tell you, stop it! There is no perfect family, perfect husband, wife, or child. Of course facebook only shows the good stuff, because only the "crazy" people put it all out there, right? Maybe they are the real ones. Stop comparing yourself, and focus on you.
Yes I am happy but that can't be decided based on a horse picture on facebook. If someone is truly a friend, you will talk to them, text them, and know what is behind the pictures and posts. You may not hear from them often, especially if kids are involved, but you know they are there for you. Friendship is a part of self-care and remember to take time to connect. I am not good at this, I get into farm chores, mom chores, and life and next thing I know it is bed time. Doesn't help that almost all my friends are in different time zones! Ok back on track!...
It is time to focus on us, self care, and stop comparing our lives. When we are in a good place then everything else gets easier to cope with and overcome. It is like the mask on the airplane, put yours on first before helping someone else. This is the same in everyday life, but sometimes social pressure and life can bring us down and we forget to take care of ourselves.
So take time to find yourself and not on social media. Here are some tips to daily self care, beyond the cup of coffee…
Instead of waking up to social media, write three things you are thankful for. Gratitude can start to change the mindset.
Stop comparing yourself!! You are you, and thankfully there is only one! So be yourself. When you see that perfect picture on facebook, remind yourself that anyone can take those pictures. They struggle too and probably five minutes before the picture someone was fighting, crying, pouting or disappointed.
Don't let yourself be treated with less respect than you want. If we start to tolerate disrespect and being devalued, then we are giving permission for people to do so. Set your standard, even if you have to start over with the same person, and don't deal with less. You are just as important as your spouse, friend, or significant other or family member. Life is too short to be dealing with toxic relationships.
Relationships are hard. Marriage is hard. And friendships can be hard. But you are enough and important so evaluate the relationships in your life and if they are toxic and unhealthy, then adjust your standards, and distance the relationship if you have to. This goes for marriage too, just because you are married does not give someone permission to treat you poorly. Set them straight, work on it, but don't settle for a toxic relationship. Life is too short
Find yourself, and hold on to you, reminding yourself daily that you are enough and important.
And again, don't compare yourself to social media!!! You got this!!! Just remind yourself of your strength!!